Ugh.

No seriously, ugh.

I had such high expectations for Disney’s new version of Beauty and the Beast and now, I don’t even know why. After all the weeks of hype surrounding it, I felt sure that this movie was going to be the movie of the year.

So, there I went, walking into the theatre still clutching my overpriced ticket and feeling like I’d just been handed a delicious gluten free sugar coated donut.

2 hours and 9 minutes later, I walked out again feeling empty and cheated. My donut had been nothing more than sugar coated sawdust.

False advertising, I tell you. Gets me every time.

 

Here’s the break down of the top four reasons I hated this movie:

 

• Cringe worthy acting. And yes, I’m especially looking at you, Emma Watson.

Poor dear. Her performance seemed so forced, almost as if she was trying too hard. And maybe she was. When there are literally millions of fans depending upon you putting on an outstanding performance, it’s hard not to feel the pressure.

• The ‘Be Our Guest’ scene.

…and then there was the dining room scene.

Oh, my eyes! I think I’ll just close them now so they don’t sustain permanent eye strain damage. So much color, so much movement, so much GOING ON.

It literally puts kaleidoscopes to shame.

 

• The Sound of Music vibes.

Minus the outstretched arms. At least Disney has tact.

During this whole scene where Belle is up on the hilltop singing, I couldn’t stop thinking about Julie Andrews. And all I heard was:

“I go to the hills when my heart is lonely…”

Looks like Belle took a page or two from your book, Maria.

 

• Over dramatized and cold.

Lets face it, this movie was not heartwarming… at all. Unlike the classic animated Beauty and the Beast, this version felt over done, over dramatized and it was all just way too much. It left me feeling absolutely nothing. Emotionless.

New is not better.

 

Thanks to Cogsworth and Lumiere though, at least the movie wasn’t a total bore. They mercifully provided some comic relief. And for that, I am forever grateful.